A Threefold Cord
Mark and Nikki, I want to thank you for the privilege of letting me be a part of this special day in your lives. It has been fun watching you grow up Nikki. You have always been a sweet girl with lots of energy and a great ability to make people smile. You’re a gift to your family and to your new husband. Mark, you’re a fine man. I have had a few years now to get to know you, you love Nikki, and I think you are going to make a great husband. I especially want to thank you both for meeting with me over these many months as we studied the Bible together. It has been fun to travel with you both on that journey of faith, and I sincerely look forward to the future as God gives us time to continue to learn more about Him and about marriage.
I want to take a few moments to talk about the text from the Hebrew Bible that you chose for your wedding. It comes from Ecclesiastes, a book of wisdom written by Solomon. Solomon was rich, he was brilliant, and he was in charge; he seemed to have everything. He wrote three books in the Bible, all very different. In this one he tells the story of what life is like in this world now, the world “under the sun,” as opposed to what life is like in heaven. As a person who had it all and who could do almost anything he wanted to do, he came to the conclusion that everyone faces the same problem in this world under the sun: everything seems to fly away like a puff of smoke, everything is temporary. Our hearts are longing for permanence and we can’t seem to find it here. The only answer for us is to know God, who is beyond this temporary world, and to be connected to Him, since He is able to do things that last. That’s the way to find some peace and joy in life that will be more solid and stable than what we can do alone.
… Not that there is anything wrong with the temporary things. Solomon says you ought to enjoy those good gifts. Food is temporary, but it is good, and you ought to enjoy it. He says the same thing about the relationship of a husband and wife. It is a good gift to find a special person to be with where somehow the two become one. It is complex, but it can be wonderful, and you ought to enjoy your marriage fully. You ought to enjoy each other completely for as many years as God gives you life. That is what Solomon says. That is what God says.
The particular verses that you have picked out have some wonderful applications for your new marriage that starts today. Solomon says, “Two are better than one,” and then he gives us four reasons why that is the case.
1. You will get more done together: First, he says, you are able to get more done when you work together. There is a lot of work to do in life and it is easier and more fruitful to do it when two people work well together, especially when they know and appreciate each other’s gifts. I want to encourage you to build each other up with genuine words of appreciation, not being false or fake, but spending some time thinking about the things that each of you enjoys and does well, and thinking of the way that each of you receives encouragement in the best way, and then being a gift of a positive lover and life companion to each other.
2. You can help each other when you fall: The second reason that he gives why two are better than one is all about the benefit of having a companion when everything is not going personally well. If one or both fall down, it helps to have another person to help you get up again. That’s what Solomon says. Think of the number of ways that we fall down in life, and think of how helpful it can be when there is someone there with you who has taken the time to know you, and who is committed to you as long as you both live. That person has learned the right things to say, the right things to do. Be that for each other. When one of you falls in some way, remember what an opportunity you have to show how two are better than one.
3. You can keep each other warm: In the third place, two are better than one, because when two people lie down together on a cold night they can keep each other warm. I know that a big down comforter can work, but warmth is not just registered by a number on a thermometer. It’s about feelings of intimacy and togetherness, and those things help on a cold night, or any time when life seems cold. God likes this kind of intimacy and closeness. He is the One who invented this amazing thing called marriage. He said to the first man that it was not good for him to be alone, and so He created the woman, so that they could be there for each other in special ways. More than that, when God wanted to talk about the way that He loved His people, He used marriage to make a point. Especially when Jesus came to live for us, the Bible says that He took the place of a husband, and His church took the place of a bride to be. That was not just because God and His people work well together, although that’s true. It wasn’t just because when we fall down He is there to pick us up, although that’s true too. It was also because He intends to keep us warm in a world that may seem like a cold dark night. That’s why Jesus said, “I am with you always, even to the end of the age.” You get to live that out, in a way, in your marriage. Don’t get cold toward each other. Talk honestly and openly. Stay warm together.
4. You can protect each other: The final reason Solomon gives that two are better than one is best appreciated when you are facing some evil thing coming against you. Life under the sun is not always safe, and it helps to have a husband and wife who are standing together against some trouble. You need to look out for each other. Recognize the trials that you each might too easily fall for, and protect each other. I’ll never forget the ways that my dad protected my mom from danger (especially when he killed a rat with a tennis racket), but when Dad had the early stages of Alzheimer’s Disease, it was mom who knew him best. When he was tired, she found a way to order things so that He could keep on going. It was hard to do, but it was good, and it was love. Do that kind of thing for each other.
That brings me to the last few words of this passage, and they are the most puzzling words of all. Solomon has been talking about the benefits of being together, giving his four reasons why two are better than one, and then all of a sudden he mentions the number three. He says that a threefold cord is not quickly broken. There are some great things about being alone. God talks about that, but not in this passage. There are some real ways that two are better than one, and we have looked at four of those here. But there are times when we are brought to realize that something beyond the two may be better still. What could that mean?
Even the best marriage is not meant to be self-contained. You both need something more. Pick someone who can make that three-fold cord as strong as possible. Pick someone who is totally for you as individuals and totally for you as a couple. Pick someone who is very wise and very experienced. Pick someone who won’t lead you into things that are just plain wrong. Pick someone whose advice and direction will always be the right way for you to go. Pick someone who can conquer all the temporary-ness of life under the sun. Pick someone who loves you both enough to die for you. Pick someone who is both God and man, and who rose from the dead for you, and stay close to Him. Be more than Mark and Nikki. Be Mark, Nikki, and Christ and you will have the best possible threefold cord. You will get more done with Christ than you will without Him. He will pick you up when you fall. He will give life and warmth to your soul, and protect you, body and soul, from many troubles. His promises go beyond the limits of this life.
So stay together and stay warm. Enjoy the life that God has given you under the sun, enjoy your marriage, enjoy each other, and together enjoy and worship the God who gave you to each other. Mark and Nikki, we all love you very much, and we wish you every blessing on this special day and forever. Amen.
posted by Pastor Magee @ 6:08 AM
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